Dying Matters Awareness Week
In this modern world, we talk about our feelings more and more. Opening up to friends about our everyday challenges is no longer seen as a weakness but as a strength. Conversations around mental health are encouraged, and what was once taboo is often now seen as the norm. The subject of death, however, remains one that we struggle with.
If someone we know loses a loved one, it is often hard to know what to say or do in the moment. As the person suffering the loss, we can suddenly feel alone in more ways than one as people who would once say hello would now do anything to stop themselves catching your eye for fear of feeling awkward. Likewise, if we hear that a new friend has lost someone in the past, we have a tendency to avoid the subject rather than directly ask what happened. We assume that they don’t want to be reminded of it rather than allow them the space to confide in us about their grief.
Every year, Dying Matters Awareness week challenges this status quo, as it asks us to openly talk about death. There is no prescription for how to do this as all communities are encouraged to express themselves in whatever way, shape, or form works for them. The common theme, however, is always that opening up the conversation is never as difficult as you might think.
This year, the focus is on Dying Matters At Work. “57% of employees will have experienced bereavement in the last five years, yet fewer than one in five managers feel confident in supporting them through this.” – Hospice UK
We spend much of our life at work and we cannot expect someone to leave their complex feelings at home after the death of someone close to them. By creating an environment where we can feel more comfortable in facing the realities of death, we are already supporting people in a culture where we have historically suppressed it. Experiences of grief shouldn’t have to be hidden – not at home, not with your friends, and not at work.
At the Hospice, death is part of our everyday life. We don’t shy away from it and know what a difference it makes to people and their families knowing that we are here to support them. Be it a nurse, a doctor, a counsellor, or part of the support or admin team, we are all in the roles we are because people are dying. It is the one common direction people are all heading towards in our lifetime. And as such, the taboo that surrounds death needs to be eliminated. In doing so, we can open up a space for the normality of grief to be expressed as we support one another.
